When fire meets ice, when hot meats cold, when storm meets calm.
She was an angel and he was a person familiar with the deepest secrets of hell.
She was smothered with love and affection from the very first day of her existence. And he knew everything except what it was like to be loved.
She knew she was a priority to several people, her family most of all. Nobody cared about him, and though he would have liked to care for somebody, he just didn’t know how that was done.
The best things that Life can offer were served to her on a platter. The worst things in life were flung at him.
She loved Life and Life loved her back. He tried to take his life away many times, but no matter how hard he tried, the next world would just not admit him in.
The “good- girl” herself is baffled at how she admitted the “bad- boy” into her heart.
Ofcourse, he was pleased and flattered by her love. It intrigued him- a love so pure that only wanted to give and give and asked for nothing in return. When he was with her, he really did want to change and become a better person. How delightful it must be to have a heart like hers, which inhaled and exhaled only goodness. He liked her more than anyone in this world, that was a fact. He admitted her into his thoughts, and revealed his past, and unburdened his heavy heart only to her. Confiding in her was like a balm over his bleeding scars, for she never judged him and never condemned him. She was the only well- wisher he ever had.
Perhaps, this “better life,” for him atleast was only a distant fantasy that he never seriously thought possible. Either he never really wanted it, or he was too complacent with his routine. Even all her words and love never changed how he thought of himself. Good- for- nothing renegade who should have been dead a long time ago.
If only he saw himself with her eyes. But he never could do that. Though he heard her say it a countless times, perhaps her sacrifices for him never really registered in his head. Was it the alcohol that numbed his faculties to such a degree that made him indifferent to her selfless goodwill? Perhaps.
She wouldn’t have minded much if he kept failing in his resolutions and promises. Her patience was endless. But with time, she was forced to read the writing on the wall. He was indifferent- to himself and to her. That tore her heart apart and exposed her to a grief so stormy, that words will never do justice to it. After months of doubts and tears and second chances and hoping against hope, she decided to take the plunge and leave him.
Even in her deepest pain, she wished there was a parallel world, with only him and her. Then, she would surely leave everything to be with him. But she knew that in this world, she would never do that. She knew that she was answerable to her own people who had nurtured her with such love and attention and affection. She knew there were expectations of her. And she could not and never would forsake and disappoint the people who loved her and stood with her for someone who was so indifferent.
And so she took the plunge and told him she had decided to end things and move on. Deep inside, she feared that he would take revenge by going out of control.
She remembered how he once told her he’d kill himself if she left him. She was scared. Very scared.
The conversation took place. And she waited for the storm.
Nothing happened. Only calmness followed.
He continued to exist and the truth dawned on her. He didn’t care.